I've taken Dr Hilary's symptom checker to see if I have any of the symptoms of swine flu.

  1. Q: In the last 7 days have you been in close contact with someone known or suspected to have swine flu, lived in a part of the UK where there is a sustained spread of swine flu, or visited a country considered to be at high risk of swine flu?  A: Philippines is currently the leading country in South-east asia to have the most number of Swine Flu cases and as far as I know I never been in contacted with A(h1n1) infected people nor have I kissed a pig this week.lol.Then No!
  2.  Q: Have you been in contact with someone who has recently returned from an area of the UK or from a country where there is a sustained spread of swine flu? A: Hey the question sounds as if you've just repeated and rephrased what you have asked me on number 1! damn it.Do I really have to answer NO!
  3. Q: Do you have a high temperature (over 38 degrees celsius or over 100 degrees fahrenheit)? A: I had it last monday.Is it still counted?~Uhm maybe-YES.
  4.  Do your muscles ache? A: Nope.
  5. Do you have a bad headache? A: Yeah.An insane headache is threatening my life.I would have a hemorrhage bumping my head on the wall.
  6. Do you have a very sore throat? A: No.I wouldn't want to have one.It kills!! Anyway I use Listerine!
  7. Do you have a hacking cough? A: Yes ,I think so.Every time I cough someone will always call the police and says I'm a bomberman! wanna find out what kind of hack?
  8. Do you have a streaming nose? A: Oh my poor pathetic stubby looking nose is feeling a little runny today.It got red when I erased the writings on the board at school.What kind of streaming are you talking about doctor?Are you insane? You mean the live free online streaming of Michael Jackson? or just streaming?what do you mean by that anyway? before you answer! allow me to tell you the answer is No.ironies. . hehe
My test Results 
While it is unlikely that you have swine flu, it is possible that you are suffering from either human seasonal flu or a common cold. If your symptoms persist or get worse please call your GP, or if it is a weekend, follow the recorded advice from your surgery to speak to an out-of-hours doctor

Oh really?I was here to confirm if I have swine flu or not and then I'll end up with nothing but a crappy seasonal flu?No.I believe this free online swine flu checker of yours foretells me that I will have swine flu sooner.I hope -not?!But anyways I believe I have swine flu.I have a pet swine and as you've said a flu.Be there when I die!!
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